The crew once again collected at Anna’s Cider on a warm summer afternoon. I arrived to find chairs set up amphitheater-style surrounding Fr. Brian, the group already deep conversation. Father began his talk with a prayer, pleading Mary’s intercession. His talk was broken into two parts. The first addressed the attack on family – what it is, its origins, its implications. The second addressed possible solutions.

The attack on family, he posited, begins with the notion of self and what it means to be human. This idea was influenced by the book “The Rise and Triumph of the Modern Self” by Carl Trueman, a book highly recommended by Father. Fr. Brian focused on three philosophers who molded the current idea of self and humanity. First was Rousseau, who recognized self as psychological. To be fully human is to adhere to your sense of self apart from society. Next came Freud, who said that to be fully human is to be sexual expressive. Finally, Marx came and said to be fully human is to be political – society needs to accept and support the expression of all its members.

Because of these views, we see emerging the following teaching: to be fully human is to express oneself without criticism. This teaching, Fr. Brian stated, is also influenced by an overemphasis on Storge. 

There are four types of love in Greek philosophy which, while not Christian, help us understand the Christian concept of love. The types of love Fr. Brian discussed are Philia, Eros, Storge and Agape. He focused on the difference between Storge and Agape. Storge is familial love, a love which promotes care and devotion while ignoring differences. Agape is unconditional love, a love which promotes charity and altruism. Unlike Storge, Agape does not sweep differences under the rug but instead faces them in order to promote the betterment of each other. According to Fr. Brian, too much emphasis is placed on Stroge. The true Christian love, he posited, is Agape – a love rooted in truth.

Therefore, we see an attack on the family resulting from two notions: the current sense of self and an overemphasis on Storge. This leads to the view of family as an oppressive structure and, within the family, an absence of Agape.

The solution to the attack on families was two fold: forgive our parents/elders/community, then move forward to unite the family of the Church. 

In the course of the Q&A, another solution emerged: the foundation for Agape, or loving in truth, is trust in our daughterhood and sonship. In turning to prayer, scripture and the sacraments, we become rooted in God’s love. From there, the desire to live and love according to Truth flows.